Shake

 

††††††††††† I shake my head, a smirk on my face. I donít want it there. Heís silent. Silence. Iím silent. I try to think of something to say, but all I can think of is how much trouble Iím having at this. He look at me, and repeats himself, ďYour turn.Ē

††††††††††† I shake my head again, pretending to focus on what Iím doing. I canít concentrate. I canít come up with anything to say. Someone else walks up, rambling nonsense. He laughs, a genuine laugh. Iím jealous. Why canít I do that? The other person walks away, he turns to me, ďWell?Ē

††††††††††† I continue to shake my head, and smirk. I donít even know why. Maybe itís because heís standing there. Maybe itís him. Maybe I canít think of anything to say because heís so damn distracting. Those damn eyes. Donít look at them. Donít look at him. Just close your eyes and pretend heís someone else. Maybe it will work then.

††††††††††† I shake my head, trying to shake him away. I canít. Heís still there. Waiting for me to come up with something to say. A conversation three months in the making. Iím pathetic. Nothing has happened worth sharingÖ

††††††††††† I shake that thought out of my head, thatís not true. Lotís of things have happened. Nothing I can tell him about. Iím temptedÖ

††††††††††† But I shake the idea, and continue my lie.

††††††††††† ďI guess I just lead a boring life.Ē